FROM VICTIM TO SURVIVOR

To tell my story as a date rape survivor and communicate my message in a way that can help the most people.

Thursday, August 14, 2014

Making a Difference

...The Spring and Summer of 2011 would prove to be very busy relating to speaking events. In April I would be returning to Stockton College for their TBTN event. Since the format in which I would be speaking would be arranged in a more personal setting I was asked to submit a short bio to be ready prior to my speech. I arrived in the late afternoon to meet Elana and a few representatives from the local rape crisis center at the smaller student center by the dorms. We would greet the men as they completed their Walk in Her Shoes march and wait for the other attendees to arrive. Information tables were set up to offer the various services by the campus Health Center, local rape crisis center and Green Dot initiative. I was introduced with my bio, gave my speech and answered a few questions following it. The floor was then opened up to anyone who wanted to speak. A few very brave girls stood up and told their story either of being assaulted or being an ear to a friend that shared their assault. I would find out later that my speech inspired a girl to speak out for the first time about an attack on her made by a boyfriend during high school. This resulted in her seeking counseling. To my knowledge she was the first of the "one" that I always refer to when I say If me speaking out and telling my story helps one person to speak out and get help then my mission is complete. I hope there have been many more over the years!

There were also some new speaking opportunities that came my way. In May I received a call from Caitlin, she is the girlfriend of my co-workers son and the one who helped him after seeing my ABC News interview. She was the Director for SERV which is the sexual assault program for three counties in NJ. She wanted to invite me to speak at their
victims advocate training. We scheduled a meeting first to introduce ourselves along with her colleague and I came in to speak to the group. I was finally becoming more comfortable with my speech and able to get through more easily every time I presented it. I stayed around after to chat with the volunteers one on one and they also thanked me for coming with a nice gift basket. So far I hadn't been paid for any of my speeches which was fine but the opportunity for me to become a professional would soon present itself.

The next day Caitlin sent me a very nice email to say thank you and provide feedback from the group (which I always welcome) and also to relay that a representative of SERV in another NJ county was in attendance and wants me to speak to her victims advocate training. I of course jumped at the chance knowing that the more groups I spoke to the better and I also hoped their would be a continuing snowball effect. I received a call from Denise, a volunteer supervisor, and we continued our correspondence to schedule the date I would speak to her training group in July. This time I also brought along a copy of the ABC News interview as Denise would be able to make a copy for her volunteers to review. She felt it provided an additional perspective to the speech I had given.

I would continue to be busy booking additional speeches for the Fall, not only a return to WOAR but through them I would get very valuable referral that I use to this day...

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